We became empty nesters about a week ago. I asked my husband
to make a sign for us and our daughter took our photo with it this week.
I got this idea while googling "Empty Nest", and I liked it.
I've been pondering our married life and life with children for awhile now.
22 years ago there was a kind of young couple in love.
I dreamt of a family. We dreamt of a family.
We dreamt of having seven children.
We were blessed with two. God knew the right amount for us.
Two became three. I'm not sure how anything got done
I was so in love with my little boy.
I look so young in these photos.
Then three became four. I so wanted a little girl.
I wanted to do all the things with her that I had done with my mom.
All those fun girl things. We did many of them too.
Girls days out, shopping, sharing books.
Life was busy with young children. I'll admit I focused more on
those two children for many years than I did on my husband.
I loved being an at home mom. It was very fulfilling.
I wouldn't trade those days for anything.
My little babies grew into young children, and off to school they went.
I cried. I missed them. That was when I realized that they would leave someday.
That was when I began thinking, what do I want to be when my
children grow up and leave me. That's when I started working again.
First it was a part time job.
I loved that first get me out of the house job of being a Librarian Assistant.
It was nice to have a bigger social circle. It was nice to have
adult conversation with someone other than my husband.
I love all these photo's we did over the years.
I love looking back and seeing my family growing, changing.
From babies, to young children, to pre-teens,
to teenagers. We have wonderful photos and memories.
Then it happened. Our baby boy graduated. I kept asking "don't you want
to shrink down and start again?" He would say "No Mom, that's not how it works."
I like this photo. They are both on the cusp of leaving. Our son was preparing for a mission,
our daughter heading into her senior year of high school.
I think a few years before this I realized I needed to switch my focus.
I started reading books on strengthening your marriage.
I started looking at my marriage and husband and deciding where I wanted my life
after children to go. I started making empty nest plans. Don't wait for the empty nest to
reevaluate your life. Start before it. I should have started even sooner than I did.
Work on your marriage always, keep it strong. It's sometimes
a full time job.
I raised this really bright caring young man. He has these dreams.
His first dream was to serve a mission. This is a few days before he left.
It's hard letting a child leave the nest. I think it's hard for them to leave.
My son did it though. He got on that plane and flew to Mexico.
That is something to celebrate. Your child heading off to chase a dream.
The first Christmas card with one child off on their adventure.
Then child two is preparing her departure.
She has watched my son leave and looks for that freedom.
My independent head strong child. Watch out world she is ready to
experience new things. Senior year was hard, and I'll admit I let her skip school
often. I wasn't worried as she continually maintained a 4.0 GPA.
The summer of getting ready for college. I think Colleges should realize
that an 18 year old is not totally an adult and let parents see things,
like the bill, the rules, the move in date. The most stress
was trying to get my daughter to learn how to look these things up and
work with me to get things done.
Packed up and ready to move into the dorms.
I was ready for this day. I planned things to do after we dropped our daughter off.
We kept busy the first few days of having an empty nest.
The house was very quiet. They are off, but know that we are here when they need us.
They do still need us.
So we have gone from two, to three, to four, to three, to two.
I'm excited for this new adventure.
This past year I have planned and taken my husband on a weekly date.
I have set up more projects than I have time to do. I'm excited to have some
time for myself, time with my husband, and time for my children when they come home
to visit.
Of course I also have to make time for my fur baby.
we may get a kitten to keep her company.
22 years and more to go. I like the song by Alan Jackson
"Remember When"
"and when the children grow up and move away, we won't be sad
we'll be glad, for all the life we've had. And we'll remember when."
Not only do we have great memories to remember, we still have many great memories to make.
So the empty nest is not a sad moment, it's a celebration of the changing dynamics of
our family. I'm looking forward to the adventures awaiting us.
G.G.
If you are an empty nester what did you do when your children left?
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