Here it is....the test I took last week after being late for over a week....I didn't think I was pregnant...but there is always that chance that your birth control method did not work and since I'm the type that worries a little too much, I took a test so I would know for sure that I wasn't. (plus when you call the doctors office that's the first thing they ask you) As I thought of making this blog post April 1st seemed the best day to actually publish.... I mean either way what a good joke...Oh and Pregnancy tests are so different from 17 years ago...they count down to the answer....all digital....I also have to say...I felt a little silly buying a pregnancy test...I should have 1. worn my wedding ring ( I take mine off at night as it bothers me when sleeping and often forget to put it back on) 2. gone through the self check out line...I went through the regular line and then had the little old lady cashier staring at me and the little old man behind me...I felt almost like a teenager again.....I actually hid the test under stuff encase anyone I knew happened to be in the store...I didn't want to have to explain it all.... I'm so silly!
Of course my Fur Baby had to help me....( Cat's just don't understand privacy....) I have to say even at almost 43 or 44 I can't keep track of my age the thought of becoming pregnant is not something that I really want to even have to think about... And after a week of being late, I was thinking of all the problems a baby would cause to my life because the children I have are about to fly out of the nest so to speak.... and I have dreams of what I want to do with the rest of my life...And a baby is not that dream....
I saw this statement on a friends Facebook page yesterday and replied there are worse things than a period. That worse thing is a body that has hormones that are out of balance. I have had issues with this since I was 35 and can tell you it is no fun. A little over a year ago I missed my period, missed it for 2 months. While those two months were wonderful... (who doesn't want to not have a period and not be pregnant,) I knew something was wrong and that I needed to go to the doctors, but I thought, any day my period will start.....And then I learned what it was like to have the never ending period. Let me tell you if you get your period every month be happy. You never want a never ending period.....That is no fun....Absolutely no fun......( I knew what the woman with an issue of blood felt like...and wished the Savior was there for me to touch!) I was talking about this issue with a friend and she said, I had two this month....I said maybe you had mine for me thanks!
I now have a doctors appointment, because Peri-Menopause HATES me....I'm sure I'm growing some kind of ovarian cyst....I hope to find some other treatment than birth control pills because I HATE them...(thus the reason I'm in this state again, because I decided to stop taking them, let my prescription run out...and ignored that fact that I hadn't been to the OB/GYN in awhile... Can you blame me?? does anyone like to see them?? especially someone like me who always gets sent for ultra sounds and the violating wand thing...) ..my life is one of those where no day is exactly the same and taking medication at the same time is something I just can't figure out....
This is the biggest I want my family to be...and most likely that is how big it will stay...My husband well.. he I think would be all for a baby, I watch him at church just playing with every little child there is.. He even joked about us being like "Sarah and Abraham" in the bible having the late in life child. But to me another child is more work than I want ,sleepless nights, losing my identity again....I'm not the person I was 17 years ago, the young woman who wanted babies and wanted to stay home...I feel for those women who have what I have and want children because every missed period to them is the possibility of a bigger family...for me it is not that....Well what a way to bring in April fools day....My body out of balance and thinking "OH MY GOD I MIGHT BE PREGNANT....THANK YOU GOD THAT I'M NOT...... Did you fall off your chair at first...when I sent an e-mail to my mom she said she did.
Do you have any Peri-Menopause horror stories???
Have a great April Fools day!
G.G.
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