Back to school week for me since having children in school, has been one of grief and stress until moving to Utah. Look at these two little ones off to school, who could predict that my son would be bullied from Kindergarten till 8th grade. First days of school were not the only nervous days, each day that followed would hold stress for me.
It wasn't just the first day of school that we had sad faces. In fact there was a year where I had to hold my child at the bus stop to keep him from running away. He would tell me how he was going to get off at school and walk home, or when I wasn't looking he would decide to jump on the train and ride to the city. How I wished to keep him home and protect him, but you have to go to school.
Third Grade that was the good year. That was the year of the teacher who understood, the teacher who saw the brilliant child, the one who challenged him and saw his potential. That was the happy year, until unfortunately for us the teacher got pregnant and left. The one great advocate gone, and all went back to the same.....
6th grade thing got a little better, changing schools, changing classes so you don't have the same people and students around. Life got better. My son also became the one who helped those others who were being picked on. He grew thicker skin, he stood up for himself, and even though he got in trouble on the bus, he didn't let the bully pick on him anymore. The bus drive though he had to tell the principal was so pleased to see the new more confident child. Yes all the adults knew who was the victim, and yet this was before the victim was more protected. We knew how to cope, we talked about the day, did you have friends to sit with? Did you get picked on, how did you deal with it. What are your feelings. When we moved to Utah and we would give our friends kids rides home they wondered over these conversations, but to us it was just the normal end of school day check up.
This year as we paid fee's and prepared for school, there was this confident young man before me. I'm excited for school he said. Would you go back and change the past and bullying I asked? No, I'd keep it all the way it was. Why? Because it made me who I am. And I'm proud to be myself. I can be myself and not worry about what others think. I can be creative and not care that others don't understand. Do you have friends in your classes? Yes. I have lots of friends and it's wonderful. I just thank God for this talented young man, and for sending us somewhere where he is accepted and cared for.
Both my Artist and Athlete are doing so well here in Utah. Perhaps the east coast schools are so much better academically, but they never challenged my son any ways.. Here at least I don't hold my breath all day wondering what type of day he had. They both are in honors classes both have lots of friends. A parent can't ask for more than that. So glad for children who get up and go to school happy.
G.G.
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