Did you know that I make book marks? Yes as I gave it my all, one of the many extras I contributed to my beloved and now gone job was book marks. I made hundreds, maybe thousands of them. The kids liked the lizards the best. I'd do all different colors. They would collect them like they collect silly-bands. Here is a photo of a few that I have made. I got a bunch of different cat ones and at the 4-h open house we will be giving them out.
Today was a very bad day for me. I should have been going back to work today. I should have been getting the library ready for kids, but I was home crying. I'm still not quite stable. Any little thought brings me to tears. It's like losing a beloved friend or pet. You think I'm over it, and then no your not. That day comes along and guess what you are crying. I wonder and ask what are your plans for me God? What is the next move, where do you want me to be? I'd always thought this job was a gift from God, and now what? Where am I supposed to go and what am I supposed to do now? I feel very lost, basically because I had fit so well where I was. To think there is some other place is hard. I need to move forward, and yet I'm like a deer in the headlights frozen. I know I must move forward but every part of me is frozen. Please let me move before the on coming car hits me!
So one of the wonderful parts of looking for jobs is filling out applications. The one thing I found is that I don't like the little online tests these companies think they should subject you to. I'm not sure how you can determine whether a person is going to be a good employee by subjecting them to a 1/2 hour long test. 10 minutes of it being a timed test that is math and vocabulary and extremely strange. Then the rest of the test is 12 pages of the same questions asked in different ways, to the point where your brain is in a knot. Did I answer agree, strongly agree, neutral or disagree to that one two pages before. There was one question that I knew the answer to though. My previous employers thought I was one of the best employees they ever had. I strongly agree to that! I'm a very hard worker, just please give me someplace to work.
My husband is settling into his new job, sleeping and billing more hours with each week. He now has in some ways the dream job that I had. A place where people are nice to you, where you are learning and growing and feel comfortable. Someday I'll have that again.
Patience - The ability to put our desires on hold for a time - is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter "nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect."
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