Looking back at 2015 I feel we had a pretty good year...I don't feel as storm tossed as I have in the years before...I like this photo of my husband and I looking out at the calm ocean in New Jersey...I'm hoping that our life this year can remain calm that we can have more joy than sorrow and more success than failure...That we can grow but not be challenged to a point of frustration and heart ache....
The big loss of 2015 was the loss of my Father in Law....As I have watched my husband over the course of this year I have seen him battle with the grief and unfinished relationship....I was glad that he had been able to go and see his father before his death and have a little peace...But we had believed he was getting better and that we would all see each other during our planned summer vacation...It was hard to have the loss come so unexpectedly....I'm thankful that we had airline tickets and the ability to have my husband be able to attend the funeral....Loss takes time to heal from...I find some comfort from my belief that there is a part of us that lives on and that the spirit of our departed loved ones is able to watch over us...I imagine my father in law in a young state again and that he comes to events with us...That empty chair next to me is not empty but there is a spirit of a loved one with us watching band concerts, celebrating good times and comforting us when we are sad...On our way to Vermont this past year the song "Paper Roses" came on and I thought my grandmother Miller must be with us as we would sing that song together....
One of my focuses this year was spending more time with my Husband and seeing more of Utah...When we moved here we were storm tossed and tired...We went right to work and have felt like we have been barely treading water...I think the first two years here if I had just sunk under and left this world I would have been happy....This past year I have finally felt as if I'm stronger and that I have energy...One place we visited was the Thanksgiving Point Tulip festival...I would love to buy a membership to this place it is beautiful and to go on walks often would be nice...That is one thing I'd like to do this year go on more walks with my husband...
We also had our yearly trip to the Salt Lake Temple to see all the flowers blooming...I love to see gardens...I hope we can find some new ones to visit this year...I'll have to make a list...
Despite losing all our free plane tickets that was the reason we could go out East for a visit...We went...Because sometimes you just have to live and do....And we needed this trip on so many levels....
We needed to see family and friends and my husband needed to be by the ocean...We walked down our old neighborhood streets and had all our favorite foods...
We went to our favorite park...And spent a few afternoons at that beach....If only we could have made time go slowly that week....
Then we drove to the green mountains of Vermont and had time with my family....We got to relax and eat wonderful food and spend time visiting....
We had a cook out on the hottest day of the year for Vermont...It didn't seem as hot to us...We loved being surrounded by the Green and my family loved the humidity in the air...I have to say I like the dry desert air...
Once home the rat race began again...The kids got ready to go back to school...My son is a senior...How did that happen....My husband worked so many hours that I wished we had made our trip a little longer...and I knew the holiday rush of retail was looming in the distance....
We started the process of looking at colleges...My son hopes to be an animator someday...He is always drawing and animating and dreaming up ideas..He has been accepted to one college so far and waiting to hear from others...
Senior Photo's and and School photo's came and I was very pleased with how well they came out...I think often how did these two children grow up so fast...And I feel blessed because they are good teens...They are the type that you want to keep and yet realize you have to let them go...They have their journeys ahead of them...my biggest hope is they are happy and find life to be good and have more success than failure...
My daughter had lots of Karate events and moved up in belt ranks....It is fun to watch her learn and do in this sport...
My son has been learning to cook and do things that will help him survive on his own...He has a job, and likes the independence of making his own money....Just wish he would like to save a bit more...
We had a family photo adventure...It's the last one with the children as children or a I guess teens/young adults...We are not sure if our son will be home next Christmas he could be...Or he could be called to a mission and be far away...I'm not quiet ready for that...And yet he looks forward to it...He would like to go far away and be tested...I would like to keep him close by...Our little family is changing...We started out as two...Then had three..and then four...and now we will go to three..and then back to two...And yet we are not totally losing the two children...and perhaps in the future we will gain another daughter and son through marriage and hopefully down the road grandchildren....This circle of life is amazing...full of Joy and sorrow...and goes by way too fast.....
I hope you had a good 2015 and that 2016 will be one to enjoy...
G.G.
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